Personally I disagree with the emphasis on the remembrance of violent deaths. I would much prefer to focus on the successes.
I can see the argument that you are ignoring the people worse off than you, but that is not generally why it is done. It is done because our minds form new ideas based on abstractions. Most people seen in society are the normative face. Thus if you present the normative face of transgendered people you get a better understanding from society. Instead of parents worried that their children will be brutally murdered you have parents knowing that their children can still do fine.
Likewise transgendered people themselves benefit too. Remembering only the bad things places an enormous burden on transgendered people. You are suggesting to them that if they transition they will be killed. Most will do so regardless, but it is still a heavy burden to bear.
I'd prefer to remember the successes.